Friday, 28th July 2023
Alex Buabeng-Korsah
TOPIC: DEALING WITH CONFLICTS
THEME SCRIPTURE: “If your fellow believer sins against you, you must go to that one privately and attempt to resolve the matter. If he responds, your relationship is restored.” – Matthew 18:15
PREPARATORY QUESTIONS:
- Why does misunderstanding arises among believers?
- How must believers resolve conflicts and misunderstanding?
Jacob absconded from his father’s house to his uncle Laban when Esau wanted to kill him. After twenty years with Laban, Jacob has absconded again with his wives and children (Gen 31:20–21). This time he is heading towards his father’s house. When Laban learned of Jacob’s secret departure, he also chased him (Gen 31:22–23). It took Laban and his team seven days to overtake Jacob.
Meeting face-to-face, Laban and Jacob had to deal with their conflict, and the outcome will determine their level of maturity.
Jacob was not pleased with the way his own uncle had treated him. He expected him to treat him as a relative, but rather, he felt used and kept in servitude by his own uncle. Laban is also dissatisfied with Jacob for leaving his house unannounced. He [Laban] never had the opportunity to kiss his daughters and grandchildren goodbye. Further, someone on Jacob’s team has stolen Laban’s gods (Gen 31:27-30). Beloved, whenever there is conflict (in the home, workplace, church, etc.), resolving it is important.
Poorly resolved conflicts always produce fractured relationships. Further, how can we say we love God when we are not on good terms with our brother?
Jacob and Laban, after 20 years of a strenuous relationship, seemed ready to resolve their conflict once and for all. Each party seemed to have a legitimate reason to demand a pound of flesh. But conflicts are not resolved when we are interested in our pound of flesh but rather in extricating peace, progress, and lessons from the disorientation the conflict created. Jacob courageously told Laban exactly why he needed to leave (Gen 31:31). He also expressed to Laban his dissatisfaction at the treatment meted out to him (Gen 31:38-41). Thus, first, there was a sincere confrontation of the issues between them. Laban also shared his concerns. Secondly, there was concession on the part of both parties. Laban did not deny how Jacob felt or the issues he raised. Neither did Jacob deny how he had fled unannounced, except that he was surprised at his uncle concerning the stolen gods. Jacob offered his uncle the opportunity to search his tents. In the end, they settled their differences to move on. Jacob got his freedom, and Laban got his kisses.
Precious one, confrontation and concession are two key ingredients for conflict resolution.
In our marriages, at the workplace, in the church, and in the community, conflicts can emerge. In conflict resolution, parties can only disagree to agree. Also, both parties should not underestimate the interference of their ego. Where there is ego and competitiveness, losing sight of the fact that we are on the same team, and we are aiming at the same goal is probable. Speaking truth to one another in love, rather than winning, and accepting the moth in your eyes first before pointing to the moth in your brother’s eye, is the way to go. As much as it lies in you, if possible, live with all men peaceably (Rom 12:18). Remain blessed.
FURTHER READING – Genesis 31
Call to Salvation: Today is your day if you have not received salvation by turning over your life to Jesus Christ. Click here to do so
QUESTIONS TO HELP YOU MEDITATE ON THE WORD:
- Do you still have unresolved conflicts in your life?
- Do you see your ego interfering so that you are finding it difficult to initiate resolution?
CONFESSION
Eternal Father, I receive your strength and meekness to seek peace and pursue it at all times. I affirm that the love of God is shared abroad in my heart by the Holy Spirit who dwells in me. Hence, in love I am making peace with all men, in Jesus’ precious name.
1-Year Bible Reading Plan
2 Samuel 14; Jeremiah 18; Romans 1; Romans 2
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